Aside from the motel out on Route 9, I’m wondering if there is a suitable place for an affair. Most people would agree that affairs are a serious subject, whether you’re talking about the neighbors, an article in the New York Times or an author’s next book. Extracurricular sex is an emotion-filled event regardless of which side of the bed you fall—betrayer or the betrayed.
A recent piece in the New York Times handles the topic of sex outside a marriage from both an analytical and emotional perspective. The article delves deep into the affair of a woman named Cynthia, her reasons for the affair (read great sex here) and the subsequent trauma of what occurs when her lover drops dead quite unexpectedly. The article goes on to offer well-honed wisdom and ultimately a happy ending for Cynthia and her husband, who we learn knew of the affair all along. The story is neatly packaged, making for an engaging read. Having never had an affair, I read the article as an interested bystander. As a romance writer, I was enthralled on a completely different level.
The article distracted me with its various plot points: 1) If Cynthia’s lover hadn’t dropped dead, how might the affair have resolved? 2) I did think the whole premise of the NYT article made for a great novel. 3) You could never use said premise in a true romance novel—not “as is.” While affairs are tough to navigate in real life, they may be even trickier for the romance writer. Let me explain:
In recent years much of what constitutes a traditional love story: boy meets girl, boy loses girl, and so on… has become more malleable. Bad boys make for the best heroes, and if there’s a little prison time involved, so much the better. Heroines had better be sharp thinkers, seriously employed with their own businesses, if possible. If there’s rescuing to be done, both parties must stand at the precipice of peril and share equally in the saving. Welcome and long live the rules of modern romance.
What hasn’t changed and isn’t salable to readers is a down and dirty affair. This isn’t an affair of extenuating circumstance—the one where the character of the husband is a monster. Such a tired storyline would, of course, give the reader ample room for justification and sympathy. But I’d like to think those easy-peasy plotlines have gone the way of dime-store novels. Readers are savvier—they simply expect more from their love story.
So the question becomes, can a romance writer create a likable, engaging novel based on an everyday affair? What if the husband were just boring? What if the couple had simply grown apart? How about if the woman met a man and found herself saying, “Uh oh, here’s the right guy. The one I’m not married to…” They’re all relatable themes. But I don’t know that you can ever get readers to root for the couple born out of these circumstances.
Add to this a sexual component. A real life affair, like Cynthia’s, was all about great sex. What happens to the same steamy page-turning love scene when cheaters are cast? My guess is it disintegrates faster than an after-sex cigarette. What works between the sheets for beloved characters, likely ends up on a bed of nails when the motivation is less than honorable.
The truth is readers want to fall in love with your characters. They want to root for the positive romance. I suspect there’s no place for Cynthias of the real world in romance novels—not unless it turns out that her husband accidently bumps into his high school sweetheart, just as Cynthia simultaneously gets hit by a bus. For as much as the romance novel has evolved—and I believe it has—readers still want their love stories to come with unchallengeable happy endings.
Barb Drozdowich says
March 2, 2015 at 12:35 amthought provoking! I really enjoyed this post! As a life long reader of romance…I agree. I would enjoy a story about an affair unless the husband is a monster or something along those lines. I need to like ( or really dislike if appropriate) the characters!
L. J. Wilson says
March 2, 2015 at 7:35 amThanks, Barb! Of course, this is not to say storylines like this don’t occur–they absolutely do, but by then I think you’ve drifted into women’s fiction. Interesting dividing line. Thank you for your comment.
Bobbi Parish says
March 2, 2015 at 1:33 amWhat a thought provoking question! I had to really think about it, especially since I’m not a writer of romance or even books with romantic plot lines. But I have to say that I agree, people likely will not like the “down and dirty” affair. An affair by a wronged spouse, absolutely! But otherwise, I think they do like the happy ending that a “down and dirty” affair might not be able to provide.
L. J. Wilson says
March 2, 2015 at 7:34 amI always think it would “fun” to try–the only exception I can ever come up with is The Same Time Next Year–a play/movie about two people in that exact position. However, we never meet the spouses, which, I think, goes a long way to not making them real in the viewer’s mind. Thanks for stopping by!
Old School/New School Mom says
March 2, 2015 at 7:38 amI’ve often wondered about the psychology behind affairs. This was a fascinating read. I can see how an affair would feel thrilling and forbidden. As a reader, it feels exciting to read about a forbidden love affair. I agree with Bobbi though, ultimately the reader would probably go for a happy ending.
L. J. Wilson says
March 3, 2015 at 2:42 pmIt would seem that way, readers of romance count on their happy ending, which, I don’t think can be achieved via the premise of an affair. Thank you for commenting!
Kate O'Connell says
March 3, 2015 at 11:00 amInteresting take. The post reminded me of Sam Smith’s song, “I’m Not the Only One”. A wife who knows her husband is having an affair is shattered but he still comes back to her. I think the psychology of an affair is hard to break down. Why? Who? When? Different people have different reasons for why they do what they do. But as a romance reader, while the affair may initiate some thrill at the beginning, the stability of marriage or a serious relationship wins in the end.
L. J. Wilson says
March 3, 2015 at 2:40 pmAgreed, Kate! The idea of the thrill is easy to grasp when writing about a fictional affair, but sustaining it–or making good on it is another matter entirely!